First Lutheran Church Choir

Zowie!! This Geneseo church certainly has an awesome choir. On Tuesday, December 19th, the Geneseo Kiwanis had their “Guest Night” held at the church. For their entertainment the church choir sang various Christmas songs. Their last song, “Silent Night,” was joined in by the 67 Kiwanis members and guests. It really was a magical evening.

No Gators

Todd Sieben was fishing off the coast of Florida when his boat overturned. He could swim, but he was afraid of alligators so he just held on to the boat. Spotting an old beachcomber on shore, Todd yelled out, “Are there any alligators around here?” The old guy answered, “Naw, they haven’t been around for years!” Now feeling safe, Todd started swimming to shore. About halfway there he asked the guy, “How did you get rid of the ‘gators?” “We didn’t do anything,” said the beachcomber. “The sharks got ‘em all!”

Poor Hamster

Angie Snook quickly took her pet hamster to the vet, but sadly the vet looked it over and pronounced it dead. She wanted a second opinion so the vet brought in his pet Labrador retriever. It sniffed the little hamster and it shook his head. The vet said, “Yeah, it’s dead!” All of sudden a cat jumps up on the table, nudges it with its paw, and looked up and shook its head. Finally, Angie is convinced her hamster is dead. She asked the vet how much she owed for his services? He said, “That will be $500.00.” Angie said, “You are charging me $500.00 just to tell me my hamster is dead?” “Well, said the vet, there’s my prognosis, lab report and “cat scan.”

Ice Fishing This Winter

Well, maybe, maybe not! With the warmer than usual December days let’s hope we can have safe ice. To be smart, any 4” or more of thick ice is playing it safe. The past few years the ice conditions were up ‘n down. If ‘yer not sure, before going out on the ice, drill a few holes to gauge the ice thickness. Last winter I found ice fishing to be “iffy!” Last year our Geneseo Izaak Walton Ice Fishing Contest had to be cancelled because of unsafe ice conditions.

Up Your Sleeve

We are not card players. Even when I was in the Navy, I didn’t participate. One time Lorna and I played a few hands with another couple while on a fishing trip in Canada. They finally gave up on us. Setting all that aside, here are some card facts. 1) Some card games enforce a so-called, “British Rule.” It stipulates that the queen outranks the king whenever the British monarch is female. I guess it doesn’t apply now. 2) The fastest time a full deck of cards has ever been dealt is 16.92 seconds. 3) The chance of being dealt a royal flush in a game of poker is roughly 650,000 to one.

Donated Jokes

I think I’ll donate these hilarious (?) elevator jokes to Mr. Don Morrison of North Carolina. For some fun, the next time you’re in a crowded elevator yell “Ding” at each floor. What did one elevator say to the other? Ans: I think I’m coming down with something! Did you hear about the man who fell down an elevator shaft? He’s taking steps to avoid them now.